


If Your Love is Like a Dream, Don’t Wake Me Up.

by MadQueenCori



Category: Of Mice & Men (Band)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-03
Updated: 2016-06-09
Packaged: 2018-05-30 21:18:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6441181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadQueenCori/pseuds/MadQueenCori
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a collection of stories told mostly in Carson’s POV. Basically sort of an interview about her life. Most importantly questions about Alan Ashby, her husband. This is from when they are 22 till 29. This goes back to when they first met, got engaged, got married.</p><p>Title Credit is “Open Waters” by BlessTheFall ft Lights. #TeamBights.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Alan Ashby was a name I was far too familiar with. He had this asshole vibe. Super douchey. I hated him. We had a bad encounter with him like a year before I formed my band. He was the poster boy of hot band dudes. He has the tattoos, the nice body, the hot bod. Yeah, I'll admit he's hot. My band had the misfortune to get to tour with them. I knew I was going to hate it. I was gonna enjoy playing songs. I was going to hate every other aspect of it. He's a hell of a guitar player, I love Of Mice. They're amazing. I use to love Alan till I actually met him. 

I guess I should introduce myself, I'm Carson Tallie Wilson, ripe age of 22. I'm in a band called Mes Peurs. We are like La Dispute but I sing all of our choruses in French. I have a major in French and a minor is secondary education. I could be a French teacher if I wanted. Music has a firmer hold on me then my teaching opportunity does. Im single, I don't have time to focus on a relationship. 

On Warped Tour in a van is tough as fuck. We took advantages of every city we got to, and showered and felt nice. Sometimes, however, we do a baby wipe shower, which sucks ass. We are in Vegas for the next two days, so nice two days of showers, black jack, drinking, and parties. Of Mice and Men, no matter how much I despised Alan Ashby, always had good little parties. Austin had asked me yesterday if I would attend the party he was throwing tonight at the hotel after Warped. I told him fuck yeah, those dudes are the best partiers. I could stand Alan for a party or twelve. We are at the hotel, my band and I are getting a quick shower. We are then riding to Warped. We don't play till about 2pm, which is about the middle of the day. After the show we are doing signings and then off to the casinos. I am the last to shower, which I don't mind. I rather have tough skin with cold water than warm skin and warm day. My hair also is colored, so the cold helps keep in the color. I finish showering and I change into clothes. We all head back. We get there and who is the first asshole I run into after getting out of the van and he getting out of his tour bus, Alan Anthony Ashby.

"Fuck, I am so sorry doll," Alan says right away.  
"Nah, I fucking expect it from you," I spit out at him.  
"What the hell did I ever do to you?" Alan growls at me.  
"The run in we had a long time ago, you were a grade a ass hat," I answer him.  
"When was this?" He asks and turn his head.  
"Three years ago," I mumble.  
"Doll, that was so long ago, get over it," He states.  
"Whatever Ashby," I say.  
"Hey, Doll, I'm sorry for this and I'm sorry for back then," He says sweetly.  
"I have a name," I comment.  
"But Doll fits you, Carson," He mentions.

I just roll my eyes and finish helping the guys unload the van. Four years of being a band, Kevin had sent us an email about being on this tour after being featured in Alternative Press' must be heard list. I was super excited when this happened. This is our first Warped Tour, and it was good. I'm the one mostly driving. I bump into someone while holding my guitar case.

"Shit, sorry," I say then look up to see a short brunette guy with drumsticks in hisp hands.  
"It's fine Carson," He says with a smile.  
"Sorry Maxx," I nod as I walk to finish unloading.

I developed a relationship with Set It Off. Watching them every night then Cody noticing his last name is my first name. He's a special sunflower. I enjoyed watching them play. I help set up our small merch tent. I hang up all the samples of the merch. Someone walks over, I can hear them walk up and I feel their presence. 

"Hey Doll, you're coming to the party right?" The person asks. It's Alan, I cannot catch a break.  
"Hey Douche Bag, yeah I am," I answer as I turn to face him.  
"How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?" He asks.  
"Three years worth of I'm sorry," I sneer at him.  
"Okay, see you later Doll," He says with a sign of defeat. 

I watch him walk away. I know I was being unnecessary now. He did apologize. I just need to let up. At the party, I'll tell him it's all okay.  
Time for us to play, which is always a hoot and holler for us. I have fun and I see a few kids sing along. It was pretty cool.

*-*-*  
Putting on my nice black dress and my creepers, putting on actual make up and not just tinted sunscreen. I look at myself in the mirror. I wasn't always this glitz and glamor, but this is Vegas. I walk out from the room, the guys had already left for club. I get to the club and go straight for a drink, which is a cup of scotch. Scotch is my favorite. I'll do Jack Daniels and Smirnoff. I wasn't much of a beer person. I look at the dance floor, where guys are dancing with random girls. Some people were sitting in the booths on the outside of the dance floor. I see Alan. I walk over to his table. He was sitting there, playing with his beer label as Austin and Tino chatted along. I sit down next to Alan. Austin and Tino turn their attention to me for a quick second then, back to their conversation.

"Hey Doll, you look nice," He compliments.  
"Thanks Ashby...by the way I forgive you. I shouldn't spend time being salty as fuck over something that happened a while ago," I tell him.  
"Really? That means a lot to me. I would love to get over that and start fresh," He says, "Hi, I'm Alan."  
I take a drink of my scotch, "Hi Alan, I'm Carson." I let out a small laugh.  
"Sorry did you say Cody Carson?" Alan says jokingly.  
"Actually yeah I did, I have a meaty tuck right now," I say with a small laugh.  
He takes a sip of his beer, "You're cute, do you want to dance?"  
"Let me finish my scotch," I state.  
"Scotch takes forever to drink," He whines.  
"Nah, give me a minute," I shake my head as I take a big gulp of it.  
"Okay Doll," He says in a singsong voice. 

I finish my scotch. Alan and I make our way to the dance floor, we dance. Alan tries his best to not grind. I resist the urge to not grind against him either. I wouldn't ruin this. I like this new found friendship. The mood of the room changes as the song changes. The song was a bit slower. Alan and I face each other and dance a bit. This was great. Alan and I were getting closer to each other. Alan excuses himself to get another beer. I waited a few minutes before Alan arrives back with two shots, of which I figured out was tequila after downing it. Alan downs his shot. We made our way to the booth, that we were currently at. We order a few rounds of shots. We down each two more shots. I was starting to feel a bit tipsy, I'm a bit of a light weight. Alan seems a bit tipsy also. We both lean forward and our lips connect in a small kiss, which turned into rougher and more passionate make out. This seems right. The energy flying between us. I pull away and he looks into my eyes.

 “We’re drunk,” Alan comments.  
“Mmmhmm,” I agree with a nod.

We lean into the booth. I look at him. He smiles at me. I get up and I walk to the dance floor. I decide to dance a bit. Time flies and I end up super wasted. Charles, my guitarist, had taken me back to the room. I passed out shortly after. 

I wake up with a killer headache. I look at my phone and check the time. Noon. Fuck. I get up and drink some water. I take some pain killers. I hear my phone goes off. I raise my eyebrow as I check it. 

From Ashkitten: Hey, stole your phone last night to put my number in it. Hope you're sleeping well. Wondering if you want to grab some lunch. xx

 I smile a bit to myself as I read it. I reply to him. I type my reply.

 To Ashkitten: Sure, I am in Room 312. I am going to shower all of last night off of me.

I quickly shower and change into comfy but cute clothes. Same creepers from last night. They're my comfy shoes. I hear a small knock on my door. I was blending in my tinted sunscreen. I smile as I open the door.

 “Hey, Give me five minutes,” I say quietly.  
“Cool,” Alan says with a smile.  
“Come sit I guess,” I gesture inside the room as I walk back to the bathroom. I then put on some mascara and a lip lipstick, “I am ready.”  
“Let’s go,” He says.

 I grab my wallet, phone and the lipstick. We leave the room and walk to a small little diner. I love it. I love little diners. We get there and order our coffees and food. We just made small talk. He was actually a great guy. He's funny and he listens well. He has hard opinions on things. He’s actually, perfect. I watch him talk for a while as I eat. He was so passionate while talking about Of Mice and Men. That is a huge turn on for me. Its absolutely so cute. I find myself sitting in same booth side as him. We just talk for a while, occasionally playing footsies with him. 

Alan checks the time, “We should get going, it’s like three,” He states.   
Fuck we’ve been out that long, “Okay,” I say simply.

 I get up and he grabs the check. He pays the check and we leave the diners. We walk back to the hotel. He mentions that Austin is throwing another party later. I told him I had gotten a ticket to the Penn and Teller magic show. He just laughed at me. I pouted at him. He gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. 

“I’ll go watch magic with you,” He says.   
“Nah nah, you go to the party,” I insist.  
“Nah, Nah I am going to same magic show with you,” He insist, “Party wont be any fun without you.”  
“I don’t know if you can get a ticket.”  
“I will try to get one.”

 He takes out his phone. I watch his finger fly as we walk to the elevator. I press the button.

“Got one.” He states.  
“Really?” I question.  
“Yes,” He mumbles.

This was great. I was seeing geeky magic with a cute guy. I’m in paradise right now. We ride the elevator up to the third floor. He walks me back to my room. We stand outside my room. He leans forward and kisses my cheek, which instantly blushes.

“I’ll see you later tonight,” He says.   
“Alright, see you tonight,” I say and nod.

 I smile as I walk into my room. I am in love with him, and I think he’s in love with me. I take out my phone and I sent Alan a quick text.

 To Ashkitten: I had a nice time at lunch. Thank you for that. 

I almost put my phone down but it chimes.  
 From Ashkitten: It’s no problem. I had a nice time too. xx

I put my phone down on the bedside table.

  “So, has was the stuff with Alan?” Charles asks.  
“It was good. I loved it. He’s actually really great,” I answer.  
“So you were being irrational about the grudge for four years?” Charles asks.  “Yeah, I was,” I say.

Charles and I hung out and watched TV. We were getting caught up on current events. Nothing, interesting of course. 

It became time for the magic show. Charles had already left for the party. I was planning on hitting up the party after the magic show. I hear a knock on my door. I open it and I see Alan standing there, looking pretty nice. He had thrown a sports coat over his shirt he had on at lunch. Grab my ticket then we leave. We take an uber to the place where the magic show is held. I am so excited and we get to our seats. I look at the stage. I was squirming with excitement. Alan had traded his seat with the guy next to me. Alan held my hand to keep me from squirming. I would still squirm, Alan was holding my hand. I squeeze his hand gently once it started. This was the best two hours and one hundred dollars spent. I don’t know how Alan felt about it. We made it to the party, but it was later in the night and we decided to not drink. Alan and I dance.

 “How did you like you?” I ask him.  “I liked it. I liked watching you watch it. You had the childish amazement. It was just super adorable,” Alan answers.  
“Shut up,” I mutter.

Alan had to go, he had to take his band mates back to the. I nod and I help my band mates to our vans. After a while of tucking Charles in a seat. I hear a small knock on the door. I walk over it and I open the driver’s door. There Alan was. He lean forward and kisses me gently; I kiss him back softly. He then pulls away and walks to his bus. I sit there kind of shocked. I then shake my head then start to drive to the next venue. This is a hell of a two days. 

This is how I fell in love with Alan Ashby and This is our love starts.


	2. 2/?

I have been messaging Alan non stop. We have been hanging out all the days of Warped. It comes to the last day. Last performance of the summer, we'll have a party after. Alan and I have been attached at the hip. Alan and I are currently standing backstage before he's about to get on. We are sharing bit of silva. Austin has nudged Alan and tell him to the pep talk. Alan always yells it and ends with Rock n Roll on three. They all count up and yell "rock n roll." I give Alan a little kiss before he runs out on stage. They play and have a hella good time. I enjoy and sing quietly backstage. Alan switched his guitars after a few songs, we share a quick kiss before he takes his guitar and run on stage. Alan and I don't have labels, but we act like we do. I think about how I have to go play a small stage after this. I'm not looking forward to it, however it's the last day so I need to suck it up. Alan already had his signing today. Their set ends and Alan embraces me in a sweaty hug; I hug him back. He kisses my head gently. We lace fingers and make our way to the smaller stage. He squeezes my hand. The other band is finishing up. I share a quick kiss with him.

"Get a rooooom," Travis, my drummer, whines.   
"Shuuuuut up," I whine at him. 

It became time for us to get on stage. I share a quick kiss with Alan. I pull away and walk on stage. A couple tens of people cheer. I was excited. We start our set. I have a good time. We finish our set like fifteen minutes later. I thank everyone for coming out. I smile as I walk off after all the guys. I put the mic down and we decide to take time and load up our van. Alan helps us. We share a quick kiss at the van before we leave, separately. We are keeping our whatever it is, sort of secret. I go to my signing. We do a small signing. My band went around to watch other bands. I already sent a message to Alan that we need to go watch Lights at the acoustic stage. He sends me a message back that he’ll meet me there. I make my way to the acoustic stage as Lights sits down on the stool with her guitar. Alan eventually gets there and we sit down on the ground. Lights starts playing and singing. I smile wide as I listen. My hand had sneaked its way to Alan’s hand. Lights stops for a moment after about two songs.  

“Any request?” Lights asks.  
“Peace Sign,” I pipe up.  
She looks at me, “Yeah, do you know the French parts?”  
 “Of course I do,” I say as I get up. 

 They set me up a mic. Lights plays and sings. I sing the French parts. I spent a lot of time learning them, in case this ever happens. She thanks me afterwards. I sit down back next to Alan. She finishes up her planned set. I sing along quietly to the songs. Her sets in. I get up as they break down her set up. I get up and thank her. She says its no issue. I look over at Alan. Alan gets up and holds out his hand. I take his hand. We walk around and watch other bands. I made Alan watch Set It Off with me, which they're closing out the last day of Warped. They killed it. 

After everyone had broke down the stages. We all went to a huge club and just had a party. Thank You Kevin Lyman for this. Alan and I are sharing a booth way in the back.

 “So, where do you guys go home?” Alan asks.  
“We are off to Mount Pleasant, South Carolina,” I answer.  
“That’s so far from Orange County,” He whines.   
“Sorry Ashby,” I say.  
“But I can’t stand my girl being so far away,” Alan comments quietly.  
“Your girl?” I question.  
“Yeah, my girl,” He answers.  
“What are you implying?” I ask.  
“I want you to be my girlfriend,” He says quietly.  
“Of course I will be,” I reply with a nod.

We share a kiss. As the party goes on, we drink and dance. This was so fun. I had a good time.

 *-*-*   
I woke up with a hang over in our van. There is a long trip from Portland to Mount Pleasant. We are spending three days to go home. We decided to do 16 hours a day. We had a good time getting home. 

 *-*-* Three Days Later *-*-*  
To Mom: Got home safely. 

 I collapse onto my bed. I snuggle my pillow. I need a shower then a bath. This was the best thing ever. I love being home. I get to go get my dog from my friend’s place tomorrow. I get up and climb into the shower. I shower slowly, I enjoyed it. My phone had chimed so much when I was in the shower. I look at the messages.

From Ashkitten: Hey Doll. I miss you a bunch. You should come out to Orange County for a while xx

 From Ashkitten: I hope you're home and alive xx

From Mom: Glad to hear you got home safely

 From Charles: Hey so Ashby just posted a picture of you two. 

 From Travis: You and Alan are together? Why didn't you tell us the whole drive home?

 I open twitter and look at Alan’s tweets. It’s not there. I open up Instagram and check his account. Not there. He’s the king of posting one thing then deleting it in a second. I quickly text Charles back.

 To Charles: Where is this picture? I seriously cannot find it. It’s driving me insane.

 To Ashkitten: Where did you post a photo of us?  

I wait a bit before I get replies.

 From Charles: It’s on a fan’s twitter. I retweeted it.

 From Ashkitten: I wouldn’t dare post a picture without making sure you're okay with it xx

I get on Twitter and go to Charles account. Sure enough there it was. A picture of us sharing a kiss my van. I don’t care honestly. I press retweet. Our secret was out there and I was strangely okay with it. I pull on pajamas and climb into bed. I fall asleep shortly after. 

*-*-*   
I wake up. I look around my familiar bedroom. It's been the same since I went off to college. I grab my phone. I get up and head off to the kitchen and make myself tea. I look at my phone. It's 12pm. Sleeping schedule is still fucked up from the west coast. I see Alan had sent me a message.

From Ashkitten: I love everything about us. I hope you're sleeping well. I miss you lots xx

I smile as I type a quick reply. 

To Ashkitten: You're amazing. <3 You're also super cute.

I hit send then I put my phone down as I drink my tea. I was already itching to get back on the road. Touring is a curse. I look around my small apartment, realizing I was missing my dog. I finish my tea and walk to my room. I change my clothes and lazily throw my hair up. I grab my wallet and keys and my phone. I leave my apartment and I get in my car. I drive for about twenty minutes. I pull into the parking lot of my friend's apartment complex. I park my car and walk up to her apartment. I knock on the door gently. I hear my baby bark her little head off. She does this all the time. My friend opens the door and my dog runs to me. I lean down and pick her up and laugh as she licks me frantically. Ella is a black Pomeranian.

"How was tour?!" My friend, Rosalina, asks.   
I sit down on her couch as I pet Ella, my dog, "It was good. I uhhh got a boyfriend."  
"WHAT?! A BOYFRIEND?!" Rosalina squeals.   
"Yeah, you know Of Mice and Men?" I ask quietly.  
"Oh god, are you dating Austin?" She questions me.  
"No! Alan! I'm dating Alan Ashby!" I answer her.   
"Carson! That's so cute!" She comments.  
"Yeah, yeah," I mumble and my phone buzzes in my pocket.

I take a second and pull out my phone and smile when I see it's a text message from Alan. I put my phone down and look back at Rosalina.

"Who was that?" She asks.  
"It was just Alan," I say.   
"You can answer him," She mutters.  
"No, it's fine. I'm hanging with my best friend," I cheer.  
"Just tell him you're busy," She insists.  
"Okay," I say as I pick up my phone. 

I read Alan's reply. 

From: Ashkitten  
Hey, no, you're super cute.

I then pet Ella as I type out my reply. 

To: Ashkitten   
Hey baby, I'm busy. I'm hanging with my bestie and my doggy.

I wait a second for a reply, which comes. 

From: Ashkitten  
Have fun babe. ❤️ 

I put my phone away. Rosalina and I talk about tour and how she's been. I'm glad she's happy. She was rambling on her boyfriend, that she's been with like three years now. Oddly enough she's dating Travis and they've been in love since day one. I know he's been giving big talk about marrying her one day, which I'm excited for. I gave her my whole story on Alan and what not. She knew about the incident with him, because she was there, but now she wants to remeet him as my boyfriend not as some dickwad. I knew my parents are going to meet him, but I'm getting ahead of myself. We continue to talk about everything, I thank her for watching my dog then I leave, so Ella and I can go home and snuggle. I arrive at home twenty minutes later. I just lay on my bed petting Ella. My apartment wasn't too fun, and I honestly just wanted to stay in my bed all day. I look at my phone and decide to call Alan. The phone rings for two rings then a grumbly voice comes on. 

"Hey," Alan mumbles.  
"Hi sugar bear," I say sweetly.  
"Hi Doll," He sings.   
"Did I wake you?" I ask.  
"Nah, it's fine, I was just waking up from a nap," He answers.

Alan and I just make small talk. I told him I was already itching to get on the road again and that I wanna be out there with him, but I would want to bring my dog. He told me I could. I was thinking about a road trip to see him, however not telling him. I tell him that I need to do something and I'll call later. He said okay and he'll talk to me later. We just both stay on the line. Silence fill the room. It was peaceful. I hang up finally. I put my phone in my pocket and I start packing up for this road trip. It's going to take four days. I pack up Ella’s stuff too. I couldn’t be able to stand being away from her any longer. I know she can stand riding in the car to California. She had been from Arizona when I when I went to adopt her. She was too perfect not to. I load up my car. I put Ella kennel. I load her up in the car. I get in and I start to drive us. Four long days to California. I know Alan lives in Orange County. I think once I get to California, I’ll call Alan. 

*~*~*Four Days Later*~*~*

I finally arrive in California. I’m sitting in the drive through of In-n-Out Burger. I take out my phone and I give Alan a ring. 

 “Hello?” a semi-tired voice says as Alan answers.  
“Hey Ashby,” I say softly.  
“Hey Dollface,” He says softly.  
“Hey, guess where I am?” I question him.  
“Mm where are you?” He answers.  
“I’m in California, in Anaheim,” I say.  
“Hey! Why are you here?” Alan asks.  
“I am on my way to Orange County, to stop by for a bit and stay a week,” I answer him.  
“Yeah! I text you my address,” He says.

 He hang up and sent me his address. I follow the navigation after I get out of the drive through of In-n-Out Burger. I finally get to Alan’s house. I whistle as I see the house. I park and I grab my food and I get Ella out of her kennel. I walk up to the door and I knock on the door. Ella is too busy trying to sniff the bag of food. Alan comes to the door and open it, looking about as tired as I feel. He smiles wide as I look at him.

 “Surprise!” I say.  
“Hi dollface, who is this?” He motions to the dog.  
“This is Ella. She’s my baby girl. I hope you don’t mind,” I say with a smile.  
“She’s adorable!” He cheers. 

He motions for us to come in. I walk in and he walks out to my car and starts unloading my bags. I insisted that he didn't have to, but he disagreed. I had put Ella down and she started to sniff Alan’s dog, Nugget. I hope they get along. I sit down at the dining room table and I eat my food. Alan eventually joined me and helped himself to my fries. He told me he put my stuff in his room. I wanted Alan to show me around as soon as we were done eating. We finish eating then Alan and I get up. Alan show me all around his house. It was a pretty nice house. It was nice one story house. He has a nice back yard. I was in love with it. Surprising Alan was good idea.


End file.
